Youth Sports: Hanging up the Spikes to Spike a Volleyball

My son, Nic, was born to play baseball. Or so I thought. He excelled at baseball at a young age.  Age 10 he played on a super elite team. That team went on to be finalist in the CABA World Series and Nic was named to the All Tournament Team. He could hit and he had a great arm. He set his dreams on playing in college and perhaps beyond.

I was amazed at how hard he could throw a baseball at that young age. It seemed unnatural. I guess it was because he broke his elbow at age 11 and his arm was never the same again.

At the end of the U15 season last year, his baseball team broke up. Tryouts for the 2013 season were held immediately after the 2012 season. Nic tried out for several elite teams, teams that were looking for 1 or 2 players to round out their rosters. I talked with many of the coaches. They loved Nic's speed, hitting mechanics, hustle and attitude, but they were concerned about his arm strength. Nic's arm was about dead after the long season and during tryouts. He did not make any elite teams. He was offered spots on lower level teams, but he did not want to do that. He knew his arm was always going to limit him. He decided to hang up the spikes. He felt like a dream died to him.

I convinced Nic to play volleyball, instead of baseball, in high school. I thought that volleyball would be the perfect game for his athletic ability. He will likely be tall, he can jump through the roof and he is very quick and athletic. It is also the perfect game for his temperament. It is sport where mistakes are not recorded. It is also a sport where the fans so close to the action and loud and he loves playing to a crowd.

The Main Point

When one door closes another one always opens. And you can walk through that opened door if you keep your head up.

Nic made his high school freshman team. He sat on the bench for the first 9 games. He was frustrated, but I told him to be patient. I reminded him that he is just learning the game. I told him to work hard in practice and before long he would be starting.

He got his chance in the 10th game. He has not sat out many points since. He loves his new sport.

Youth Baseball: College Bound Star Commits Suicide

Athletes are just as vulnerable to mental health issues as anyone else.

Recently, the star HS pitcher for the Riverside High School (Tenn.), named Stephan Gant, drove his truck down a rural road, got out of the truck and shot himself.

Gant was no ordinary high school baseball player. Gant was the Jackson Sun's player of the year for three straight years. He was slated to play baseball at a perennial Top 25 baseball program and one of the best colleges in the country (Vanderbilt University in Nashville, TN). Gant was on a glide path to the pros and seemingly had the whole world at his feet, but something deep and dark was troubling Stephan Gant.

The Main Point

How can a star athlete who is envied by so many have a care in the world?

According to the American Psychiatric Association, this question is part of the issue. We all think that athletes, who appear so mentally tough are immune from mental problems.  It's also easy to overlook the signs of mental illness in people who appear so physically healthy. And athletes, who are in the spot light - whether if its local HS, college or the pros - do not do themselves any favors because they often shy away from the help that they need. Top athletes never want to appear weak to opponents, teammates, parents, coaches or the press.

Kids are participating in very competitive sports at a younger and younger age each year. The pressure to perform in front of fans - who are also critics -  can lead to anxiety and even depression.

Tips for Youth Sports Parents regarding the mental health of your kids.

1. Watch for depression and anxiety issues in your young athlete and don't ignore them, even if your kid is a stand out star.
2. Find a coach that builds confidence. Leave coaches that erode confidence. (I wish I took my own advice a few years ago.)
3. Stop putting ridiculous pressure on your kids to perform at high levels. Your kid is not going to get a college scholarship or play in the pros - and I say that with 95% and 99% confidence. And as we learn anything from the tragic death of Stephan Gant, star athletes who are good enough to play in college or the pros are not immune.

Youth Sports: Be Patient Benchwarmers, Be Patient

Lessons from Michael Jordan, Tom Brady and the newest sensation Jeremy Lin

How many kids with talent are overlooked because the coach did not see their potential?
How many kids with talent are pigeon-holed in a position that is not right for them and thus never shine?
How many kids with talent sit on the bench because another player is blocking their path?
How many kids with talent quit because the are just not big or tall enough yet?
How many kids with talent simply give up because they lost hope, or lost confidence or lost their competitive edge sitting on the bench?

Then again, how many overlooked kids with talent bide their time, continue to work hard, keep a positive attitude, never give up and finally make it?

The coaches and the scouts are not always right.

Michael Jordan did not make the varsity team of his high school as a sophomore. The coach thought he was too short at 5' 11''. Jordan worked hard on the JV level and worked hard in the off season. He played the final two years on the varsity team and earned McDonald's All-American status. Of course, he went on to North Carolina and then to become one of the greatest NBA basketball players ever.

Would the world know who Michael Jordan is if he decided to concentrate on baseball after he did not make the varsity basketball team as a sophomore?

Tom Brady enrolled in Michigan and was 7th QB on the team depth chart. Brian Griese was the starting quarterback for during Brady's first two years. After Griese left for the pros, Brady had to battle the highly touted Drew Hensen for a starting spot. He won that battle and set a Michigan record for most completions. He also led his team to win 20 of the 25 games he started. Despite this success, he was only drafted in the 6th round (the second to last round) in the 2000 NFL draft, a year with an otherwise unimpressive group of quarterbacks. Brady went to the Patriots and backed up Drew Bledsoe until an injury to Bledsoe gave Brady a chance to shine.

Would the world know who Tom Brady is if he did not continue to fight for the starting spot at Michigan when the highly regarded Drew Hensen showed up or if Tom Brady decided that he did not have a legitimate opportunity as the #4 quaterback on the Patriots his rookie year. (It is rare for a team to keep four QBs). He never lost hope or confidence, he simply prepared for his opportunity.

Jeremy Lin, the sensational new point guard for the Knicks, led his HS team to a California state championships, but only two D1 programs were interested in him, Brown and Harvard. Brown and Harvard are not exactly basketball powerhouses. He went to Harvard and played four years. He became the first Ivy League player to amass more than 1,400 points, 450 rebounds, 400 assists and 200 steals,  yet no NBA team drafted him. He joined the 2010/11 Golden State Warriors as an undrafted invitee and saw limited action in 29 games. During the beginning of the 2011/12 season, he was stuck on the Knick's bench until injuries to several Knick players open up a playing opportunity. In Lin's first 4 games as a starter he averaged 27.4 points per game, no one in the history of basketball since the ABA - NBA merger has done that.

Would the world know who Jeremy Lin is if he decided to quit basketball and go to business school to get a MBA - a thought that crossed his mind?

The Main Point

Many talented kids quit when the circumstances become challenging. If your kid is thinking about quitting, then share these stories with them to help them persevere.

And if they do persevere, and never make it after it is all said and done - then the experience of trying and never giving up will payoff in another form - perhaps in business school.

Youth Sports: Parents Role in Helping Kids Select a School

What role should mom or dad play when a young athlete is choosing a school?

National signing day for NCAA was this week. ESPN makes a big deal out of it. One of the top football recruits in the country, Landon Collins, selected Alabama over his home state school of LSU. His mom is a huge LSU fan and was not happy. Watch the video.

Crazy Youth Sports Parents Alert: It is not about you, mom.

______________

My son, Nic, is only in 8th grade, but he had to proclaim his intentions for a high school this past week too.

Nic had four obvious options. The free public high school in our town with is quite good. Moeller High School where his brother went to school. St. Xavier (the rival school to Moeller) and Cincinnati Christian Hills Academy (CHCA). Although there are pros and cons to each, all four options are strong educational institutions. Some are stronger than others but each will provide a great foundation for college. Nic couldn't make a mistake.

Nic quickly narrowed down to two schools based on baseball, Moeller and CHCA. I was ok that he used baseball as a criteria for selection because both programs were strong academically.

Moeller is a perennial baseball powerhouse. Ken Griffey Jr and Barry Larkin both went to Moeller. Moeller plays in the highest state baseball division. Moeller is a great program to prepare a young baseball player for college level. The program is highly competitive, so getting playing time is not a given.

CHCA is also well know for baseball. They have an amazing coaching staff. They are perennial favorites to win the division II championship every year. CHCA is a much smaller school than Moeller (50 boys per class compared to 200), so the competition for playing time is less.

My son set his sights on Moeller, not because of the academics or the baseball program, but because that is where many of his closest friends are going. He was also impressed with the House System. (Think Hogwarts)

I was pushing my son to go to CHCA because it is an amazing academic school and because he could play baseball, golf and basketball for the school all four years. He loves to compete.

Nic's elementary school is a feeder school for Moeller, so getting accepted into the program is pretty much guaranteed. Gaining acceptance to CHCA is much more competitive. Both schools require an entrance exam.

Nic was dead set on Moeller. He didn't want to shadow at CHCA or take their entrance exam.

What should a parent do?

The Main Point

It is not about me. My son is 14. He's old enough to make his own decisions. I believe that my role as a parent is to guide Nic, not make decisions for him. Well kind of.

He decided he was not going to explore the CHCA option. I explained to him that options in life are good and that he had nothing to lose. I also sensed that he wanted to explore CHCA, but was a afraid he would not get in. So I made him shadow and take the entrance exam. I told him that he would go through the process and then he could decide.

I remember when my older son decided to quit playing soccer in HS. He gathered up the courage to tell me. Much to his surprise, I said that was ok. That it was his life and his decision. I also told him that he was going to tryout for the team and if he made the team he could tell the coach that he didn't want to play. I knew he wanted to play, but was a afraid that he would not make it. He made the team and played.

Nic got into both schools. Together we discussed the pros and cons to each. He then made an informed decision to go to Moeller.

Guide your kids. Teach them how to make decisions. It is a life lesson that needs to be learned.

Youth Basketball: Playing Older Competition

What do you think about younger teams playing against older teams?

Last year, my daughter's AAU team finished #1 in Ohio and ended the season #9 in nation at the conclusion of the 2011 AAU National Championship in Orlando, Florida. One of the reasons for the success achieved in state and national tournaments can be attributed to playing against older, faster and bigger competition leading up to the top tournaments.

The coach is following the same path this year. She entered the 5th grade team in a 6th grade winter league and in 6th grade tournaments.

Playing older, faster and bigger competition has advantages and disadvantages. The following advantages assumes that the younger team can actually compete with the older teams.

Advantages

• The team learns how to play against strong teams.
• The team learns how to break the press against stronger, faster and often tougher guards.
• The team learns how to get rebounds despite being outsized.
• The team learns how to win close games instead of blowing out every team.
• The team learns how to lose - going 40 and 0 before a tough national tournament can add to the stress.
• The team learns how to shoot over taller competition.
• The team learns how to create space and move without the ball.
• The team learns how to help on defense because older, faster kids will often breakdown a younger defender.
• The team learns how to work hard for points because nothing comes easy.

Disadvantages

• The team could lose confidence.
• The faster paced game could create bad habits - picking up the dribble to early, forcing bad passes, avoiding drives to the rim, etc.
• Some players could get hurt against bigger players. Our team is very big for a 5th grade team so this is not a problem as a team, but some players on the team are undersized. My daughter is one of those smaller players.

The Main Point

I worry about the injury risk because my daughter is so small compared to most of the older competitors, but I am not worried about her confidence waning. She does get disappointed when she doesn't play well against a bigger and faster opponent but she doesn't get discouraged. Conversely, her confidence soars when she plays great against players who should be better than her based on their bigger size and extra year of experience.

Regarding bad habits, in the beginning of last year my daughter was overwhelmed by the faster and stronger players and she often pick up her dribble too quickly and made hasty passes. Still, she never seemed discouraged or intimidated. And the coach did not give up on her. She progressed greatly over the year and this year she moves the ball with so much more confidence and purpose.  

Overall, I think that teams should play up against older teams if they are exceedingly better than the same age competition in their area. A good team that wants to do well in state and national tournaments needs to find the right competition level to challenge them and make them better. For me enjoyment of the game and confidence is the key to success, so a team should never move up to an older league if it will erode the confidence of the players or take the fun out of the game for the players.

This past weekend, CC's 5th grade team came in second in a 6th grade Cincinnati Christmas Classic Tournament. They lost a low scoring physical game in the finals 15-18 against the 6th grade team from the same select basketball club. CC was the smallest player on the court, but she scored 6 points and was called upon to attempt the game tying 3 point shot with 3.5 seconds left. She got the shot off, but it did not go in. She was proud in defeat.

Youth Soccer: What does it take to play D1 college soccer?

What does it take to play D1 college soccer?

1. Skills - absolutely, D1 college players are among the best of the best.
2. Speed - yes, soccer is a super fast game especially at the D1 level.
3. Determination - yes, you've got to want it because there are plenty of players who will try to take it from you.
4. Perseverance - yes, every career has ups and downs. Only the strong-minded survive.
5. Toughness - yes you need both mental and physical toughness.
6. Heart - yes, the desire to play has to run deep.
7. Support - yes, you need people who believe in you
8. A chance - yes, you need to get noticed.
9. Size - no, not necessarily, but toughness is a must.
10. Playing time in HS - no, apparently not. Some kids are late bloomers.
11. Success at college showcase club tournaments - no, apparently not.

This story proves that all of the above is correct.
.
I was the head soccer coach for my older son's team when he was U10 to U13. The team I coached was the B team in a competitive select / travel soccer club. The A team was dominant. Every year, we would have a tryout and the A team coach would take the top 15 players. I took whoever was left.

The club was strong so, we had a few strong players on the B team. We also had kids with potential. Some of the kids had skills but no real burning desire. Some of the kids had loads of desire, but limited skills. Some kids were confident in their abilities and others lacked confidence. It was the job of the coaching staff to inspire and teach each kid and help them advance in the sport.

The coaching staff consisted of 1) a former Brazilian soccer pro who worked with the team on technical skills, 2) a former college coach who worked with the team on the tactical aspects of the game, 3) an affable, assistant coach with a passion for the sport and 4) me, a D licensed coach.

I think that we did a fairly good job. A few of our kids were promoted to the A team and eventually played significant roles on their HS teams. I always felt a sense of pride when the players from our team were highlighted in a HS soccer game recap in the local newspaper.

Brian U10

One of my favorite players from our team was a great kid named Brian, the assistant coach's son. Brian was a skilled player who could play defense or offense. He was small, but what he lacked in size he more than made up for in hustle, heart and determination. Brian's endurance and fearlessness were strengths of his game. He never seemed to tire and he never backed down from bigger players. Regardless, I never saw Brian's name in any HS sports newspaper stories. According to his dad, Brian made his high school team but did not play much.

Brian did not let that deter him.

Youth Basketball: A or B Team Which is Better for You?

As a parent you want the best for your kid in sports, in school and in life. You want them to succeed and fulfill their potential at everything they do.  To help them get to the highest levels of any endeavor, you work with them or you find coaches, teachers or mentors to help them, you encourage them when they have doubts about their abilities and you nudge them when the fear of failure is holding them back. An aware parent also has to recognize when not too push.

Last night, my son, Nic, went to basketball tryouts for his school's 8th grade team. He has played on the A team for the last two years, but he had no intentions of playing for the A team this year. And I had no intentions of pushing him.

Flashback: At the end of the 6th grade regular season and throughout the 6th grade playoffs, Nic's scrappy play earned him a spot on the starting five of the A team. It was a result of pure determination and hard work and he was so proud of himself. Still, when 7th grade tryouts came around his heart told him to jump to the B team and have fun. His head and pride (and maybe my pride) told him to play on the A team again, so he accepted a position on the A team again.


During the 7th grade season, Nic was not an A team starter anymore. He was relegated to a somewhat limited backup role. He and I both understood this because my son doesn't even pick up a basketball during golf and baseball seasons while others work had hard in the off season to improve and advance.

The coach did love Nic's intensity and quickness on defense, but he didn't have a role for Nic on the offensive side of the court. My son didn't exactly relish his limited role or the intensity of the hard-nosed coach who wouldn't let him wear his headband so after enduring a long miserable season he decided that the B team would be the best option for him.

After the season he said "I've decided to take my talents to the South B team. On the B team I will be a featured player, I will handle the ball more and I will be allowed to wear my NBA swag."

As it turned my son was not the only A team player to opt for the B team. Only 7 of the 9 original A team players decided to return. Two perennial B teamers had high hopes to make the A team but did not make the cut. The A team will make a run with only 7 players.

The Main Point

Parents get a certain amount of pride by saying that their kid play on the A team. As such many parents push their kids to reach for the top teams in the top leagues. The A team, however, might not be the best player development situation for the kid.

My son is deciding between two high schools for next year. One school is big and wins State Championships, the other school is smaller. He has very little chance of making the basketball team for the big school (unless of course he grows 10 inches), but he has an outside chance of making the squad of the smaller school. He will increase his chances if he improves his ball handling skills. He wouldn't improve his ball handling skills as a role player on the A team, but he will gain valuable experience handling the ball in game situations on the B team.

Youth Soccer: Full Spectrum of Emotions for Dads of Goalkeepers

In 1980, Robert Plutchik created a wheel of emotions which consisted of 8 basic emotions and 8 advanced emotions each composed of 2 basic ones. I think that he studied fathers of 10 year old girls who happen to play goalie for their soccer team.


I certainly went through a wide range of the emotions just this past weekend watching, coaching, cheering and consoling my daughter, CC, during the opening tournament of the season. 

Anticipation - Fathers of young athletes anxiously await the first games of a season. All week long, I couldn't wait for the weekend to come so I could see my daughter, CC play. CC was being featured as the starting and full time goalie for her elite soccer team for the first time. 

Optimism - I did not schedule any golf for the weekend because I assumed that CC's team would advance to the finals.

Boredom - My daughter's team dominated the first game of the tournament. As such, CC recorded a shutout, but did not touch the ball more than two times the entire game. The highlight of the 8-0 win for the goalie's dad was one punt and one goal kick.

One punt in 60 mins, boring.

Apprehension - Before the second game, My daughter and I looked over at the other team. CC saw the big, strong girl who injured her last season on a 1v1 fast-break. Bad thoughts ran through my mind. 

Last season 1v1 vs Number 59

Drilled by #59, CC saved the ball, injured thigh

Annoyance - In the second game, the wing defenders were not getting back on defense while my daughter was getting pounded with shots. 

CC faced a barrage of shots

Disapproval - My daughter did not call for a ball in the box that she could have easily picked up. The defender hesitated expecting CC to pick it up before she decided to kick it. The weak clearing pass was intercepted and ended up in the back of the net.

Disgust - I was disgusted that the coaching staff did not make any defensive adjustments to try to protect my daughter.

The barraged continued all game long

Sadness - My daughter gave up 6 goals. After the 4th goal she was weeping in the goal thinking it was all her fault. I felt her sadness and yelled out words of encouragement.

Bad first half

Remorse - Should I have encouraged her to be a goalie. Is she tough enough mentally and physically to endure the long stressful season on a top regional team?

Fear - My daughter had to come out of the goal to shut down a breakaway threat against, you guess it #59, the strong girl who ran her over last year.

I think that I was more scared than my daughter

Admiration - I admired her courage as she deflected the point blank shot.

Ball deflected over the goal

Awe - CC made 9 truly amazing saves in three games. Saves I could have never made as a 10 year old boy.

Great tip save

Amazement - I was amazed at how CC bounced back after giving up 6 goals to just the day before to perform with absolute confidence.

Another save to preserve the lead

Surprise - I was surprised when she made a game saving stop with one hand.

Great one handed game saving stop

Anger - I was angry that the Refs did not call a handball in the box that would have led to a game winning PK chance.

Handball caught on film, but not by the ref.

The Main Point

These are the most important emotions that I felt this past weekend as the team went 1-1-1.

Joy - Several moms came up to me after the last game and were very complimentary of CC's performance. That made me feel great.

Acceptance - I accept that there will be ups and downs as the goal keepers dad.

Love - Win, lose or draw - I love my daughter.

Youth Sports: How Far Can Natural Ability Take a Young Athlete

Nic at age 2

There are some kids who are born with natural athletic ability. They seem to come out of the womb with superior hand eye coordination. They can run, catch, throw and kick before other kids can even walk steadily. At 4 or 5, they play up on teams with kids one or two years older just to find compatible players.

Will these young athletes be high school standouts, college scholarship studs or professional phenoms?

CC at 6, played
with 8 and 9 year olds

The answer. Who knows? Each kid develops at their own pace. Some kids develop coordination early and dominate in sports but then plateau. Others start off awkwardly but turn into good athletes. Some kids grow early others are late bloomers. All kids are born with confidence, but some lose it. Some kids love for sports grows, others lose interest. 

Yes success in sports requires natural ability, but passion for the sport and a strong work ethic are equally essential. A kid will not likely succeed at their chosen sport long term if he or she does not have all three qualities.

What happens to a young athlete who is born with natural ability, develops a love for the sport, but has no work ethic?

It can be a real blessing when things come so naturally to an athlete at really young age. These kids use their natural ability to achieve early success. Success builds their confidence and their love for the game. They love the game because success and its associated praise from parents and coaches comes so easily. This passion and natural ability will likely motivate the young athlete to tryout for a more competitive team.

This is when the naturally gifted player may come to the realization that they aren't so special anymore. It may be the first time that they are surrounded by other equally gifted players or perhaps better players. Their confidence will be tested for the first time. They might lose their grip on a favorite position. The praise that fueled them before doesn't come as frequently. They might start losing playing time. Self-doubt creeps in and suddenly they start thinking instead of reacting instinctively. This is when mistakes happen. They had never failed before so they do not know how to overcome adversity. Their passion for the game wanes. They never had to work hard to be good before, so they never developed a work ethic. They start to "not try" because they would rather be viewed as a kid who's not trying hard instead of a kid who is trying hard and failing. Then they quit.

What happens to a young athlete who has natural ability and a work ethic, but no passion for the sport?


Some kids who were born with athletic ability, show up to every practice, work hard and have a desire to improve, but they do not really love the game. Perhaps they stick with it because they are so good at it. Perhaps they stick with it because they are being forced to play by parents who are living vicariously

Youth Sports: The Confidence of a Daughter and Awe of a Father

Have you ever just looked at your young athlete from afar in awe?

Sometimes my daughter catches me in a trance like state staring at her and she will ask "What?" I simply reply, "you amaze me".

I am amazed by her athletic talent, but I am in awe of her confidence.

I watch her in wonder as she plays sports, or sings in the car, or does her homework without asking for help. I marvel at how easily she makes friends or the comfort she exhibits while conversing with adults. As I watch, I wonder where she gets all of her confidence and I secretly wish I had as much confidence as she.

Where does one get confidence

Did my wife and I give her that confidence or is that the confidence that all children (who just don't know any better yet) possess? Were we all born with unbridled and unwavering confidence before the reality of life gave us periodic episodes of self-doubt? I can't remember ever being as confident as my daughter, but maybe I did have it at one time.

But then again, maybe you are not born with confidence after all. Maybe confidence is developed through achievement. At 10 years old, my daughter has accomplished so much athletically, socially and academically.  She is a straight A student. She has countless friends. She plays point guard on perhaps the best 4th grade basketball team in OH. She plays goalie on one of the best soccer teams in OH (Final 4 in State Cup this year).

If success leads to confidence, where does success come from?

Famed Football Coach, Lou Holtz said that "Ability is what you are capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it."

Youth Soccer: The Pressure of a PK Shootout

There are youth sports administrators who take scoring out of games so that little Johnny or Suzie will not get his or her feelings hurt. These are the same types of people who would arrange 10 chairs in a circle for 10 kids playing musical chairs. When the music stops all the kids would have a nice comfortable place to sit and no one would get their feelings hurt by being left out.

These mamby pamby administrators would have a coronary watching a penalty kick shoot out to decide a U10 girls State Cup Soccer game.

A penalty kick shoot out is soccer's version of musical chairs.

Waiting for the ref to blow the whistle for the PK

My daughter's team was seeded 6th in the Ohio State Cup. They met their arch rival and undefeated
premier league champions, the Lightning, in the elite eight. Our team got off to a fantastic start scoring two quick goals. The Lightning did not panic and eventually tied the game on a low rocket shot through traffic that took our goalie, my daughter, by surprise. My daughter made up for it with about 1 minute left in the game when she thwarted a 1v1 by aggressively coming out and deflecting a shot wide which forced overtime.

Overtime

Overtime in the State Cup consists of two 10 minute periods. At the end of these two periods the two teams remained tied at 2-2. The game would be decided on penalty kicks.

Penalty Kicks

When the two overtime periods end in a tie, the game is decided by penalty kicks. This is how it works:

1. The players on the field at the end of the overtime are the ones eligible for the shoot out, so the coach must make sure his top shooters and goalie are on the field. 
2. At the end of the game, the players on the field cannot leave the field. This rule is in place so that the ref can ensure that the players on the field at the end are the ones participating in the shootout.
3. The coaches submited their shooting order to the ref. Each list consists of 5 shooters.
4. A coin flip determined who shoots first, the opposing team elected to go first.
5. The fans on the sidelines moved closer to the goal chosen for the shootout.
6. Goalie one (my daughter in this case) took her spot on the line between the pipes.
7. All passersby stopped to watch. You could hear a pin drop.
8. Goalie two was instructed to stand next to the corner flag on the sideline (not the end line)
9. The ref instructed the goalies that they must stand on the line until the ball is kicked.
10. The ref pointed to the position on the field where the kick should be placed - usually it is marked with a line. The field my daughter was playing on did not have a line.
11. The shooter placed the ball on the ground making sure it is sitting up and not in a hole.
12. The ref blew the whistle.

Youth Baseball: Find a Confidence Building Coach

To succeed in baseball you need skills, knowledge, passion, a short memory and the most important ingredient, confidence.

My son had all of these ingredients until last year. Last year, my son struggled and I blame myself because I saw it coming.

My son enjoyed three years of success playing under a task master head coach who taught him the game and an assistant coach who built his confidence. After the 2009 season, the confidence building assistant coach left the team. Unfortunately, he left with little notice so we didn't explore options. 

Prior to the 2010 season, my wife and I were very concerned about my son's baseball psyche without the assistant coach there to counterbalance the head coach. Sure enough, Nic had the worst season of his career and 2010 turned out to be a long painful season to endure as predicted. There were some bright spots during the year, like Nic's first home run over a fence in Noblesville Indiana and the entire Cooperstown Dreams Park Tournament. Despite these highlights my son still contemplated quitting the game that he loved so much once. 

Luckily, I persuaded my son to tryout for other teams for the 2011 season. During the tryout process,  coaches saw his potential, his leadership and his knowledge of the game. All of them were complimentary. The tryout process was the first step back to a confident state of mind. 

During the tryout process, we interviewed coaches with as much scrutiny as the coaches were evaluating my son. We were in search of a confidence building coach. We not only found a confidence building coach, but we found an entire coaching staff who would provide a positive environment. We jumped at the opportunity.

My son played fall ball with the new team and struggled in the beginning. His self-confidence was still low, but the confidence that the coaching staff had in my son was still sky high. By the end of the fall ball season, my son was hitting the ball hard and was looking forward to the spring season.

Single over the SS

Returning to the Field after a 3 Run Double

This weekend, playing against some of his old teammates who were now scattered among other teams, he enjoyed success again. In the semi-final game of the tournament he had 6 RBIs. He did it by getting back to his old style of hitting the ball the other way. 

My son also played a flawless second base (when he wasn't catching). When my son asked his previous coach if he could earn a chance to play second, the coach chuckled and told my son that he is not an infielder. He completely dismissed him.

It was a thrill for me to watch my son this weekend. I got to see his contagious smile and his geniune love of the game again. 

The Main Point

Quick word of advice. Find a coach who builds confidence and run away from a coach who erodes it. I was an idiot for not finding a better situation for my son last year.