Youth Soccer: Fighting for a Position

My daughter, CC, is in a fight for a starting position for the first time in her soccer career. She has been a standout soccer player since she was 6 years old. Recently, she was selected to the Ohio State Pool ODP team as a goalie after making it through 3 tryout phases. That does not seem to matter as the club season comes to an end.

During her 12 years, she has made every team she has ever tried out for and she always seems to be selected to play key positions. Outside of sports, she has been a star too. Life has been very easy for my little girl.

Has life been too easy? Would CC fold under pressure and quit or fight to overcome adversity when she needs to. I really had no idea, but I am in the process of finding out.

CC has been the starting goalie of her select team for 2 full years now. CC is very small compared to other players who have already matured. She is the smallest goalie in the top regional league in which she competes. The ODP trainers were not concerned about her size when they selected her for the state pool team, but I know that the coach of our team would like CC to play bigger. I read that as code for she would prefer a bigger goalie.

4 weeks ago, CC injured her shoulder in a game. CC thought it was a bruise. She complained about it hurting all week, but continued to practice and play. The pain did not subside, so we decided make an appointment to see an orthopedic doctor. CC did not want to go because she thought that they would shut her down for the last three weeks of the season. We did not want to risk a serious injury so we insisted.

CC was diagnosed with a slight shoulder separation and severe tendonitis. Surprisingly, the doctor told CC that she could continue to play out the remainder of the season if she could take the pain. He said there is no structural damage so the condition will not get any worse. He then told her that it won't get any better either until she rests it for 3 weeks and completes some physical therapy.

The following weekend, CC decided to rest for 2 games so that she could be ready for an important big game against the best team in the city the following Monday. Nothing was going to keep her out of that game, except rain which postponed the contest.

The coach called up the B team goalie, who is a big strong and athletic girl. The new goalie played well in the two games CC rested. After those games, the coach asked the B team goalie to join the team for the rest of the season. The coach wanted a backup just in case CC's shoulder acted up and she admitted to me that she wanted to test the new option out for next year and perhaps carry two goalies. CC was in a battle.

The Main Point

I talked to CC about the situation. I told her that it was actually a good situation. After I said that, she looked at me with a confused look. I told her that life has been too easy so far and it unrealistic to think that you will go through life without challenges. I told her that she had two choices, quit or fight for your position. I know that she has been considering concentrating on Volleyball, so I did not know what she would do. I was not going to force her to play if she did not have the heart for it. She sat in silence for a few minutes and then I asked her what she wanted to do. She said she is not giving up. We talked about what she needed to do to earn the respect of the coach again.

CC started an important game last Sunday. She played very well in the first half and made several key saves. She got some ice for her shoulder and prepared to sit on the bench for the last half, however, the coach sent CC out to start the second half. CC made this key save late in a 0-0 game on Sunday. The coach was pleased with CC. She came up big, she played big.

Kids learn more through adversity then they do through triumph.

Growing Up and Away From Sports

There comes a time when one realizes his or her sports career is coming to an end. It is a depressing time. It was for me.

My youth sports career was limited by my lack of focus. I played soccer and basketball and baseball and tennis and golf. I did not play any of these sports at a high level. I didn't even know that there were higher levels above town leagues. And I guess my parents were not too eager to find out about them either.

In 9th grade, my best days of baseball were behind me and I had fallen behind in soccer to players who knew that there was another level. Additionally, I was not tall enough for basketball and did not have the great ball handling skills to make it as a guard. At the time, there were no HS golf teams, so playing competitively did not cross my mind. That left tennis. I was really good at tennis, but it was not my passion. I decided to tryout for the tennis team. My high school was highly ranked, so I knew that it was not going to be an easy team to make. My dad belonged to a tennis club, so we played a couple of times a week in the mornings to prepare. He also invested in some lessons for me. When tryouts came around, I thought that I was ready. Unfortunately, the coaching staff did not. Very few freshman made the team and I was not one of the chosen few.

I immediately called the baseball coach and asked if it was to late to tryout for the baseball team. He allowed me to join in the later rounds of the tryouts, but I realized he was not paying any attention to me. When he posted the cut list, I saw my name. I wallowed in self-pity for the entire season. It was the first season that I did not have a sport to play. I didn't even pick up a racquet that season to play for fun. In fact, I never picked up a racquet to play competitively ever again.

Luckily, there was a new sport emerging, lacrosse. Few kids had played the sport growing up so I was not too far behind. My lax friends encouraged me to play. I picked up the game very quickly and found my passion. I made the JV team and eventually played on the varsity team. The game made me much much tougher. The game made me much more fit. And most importantly, the game gave me confidence and not just on the lax field. If I had all of these qualities before, I could have made the squads in any of the other sports I had played previously.

My son is going through a similar cycle and this fall is the first fall that he did not have fall ball baseball or golf or basketball. He was the last freshman cut from the golf team despite playing well. His baseball team broke up so he tried out for 4 club teams. He did not make any of the teams, his lingering arm problems finally caught up to him.

He felt the same way I did when I was in 9th grade.

The Main Point

I gave up on tennis after my setback, I will not let Nic give up on golf. Looking back, he wished that he had dropped baseball before last year to concentrate on golf. His friends that made their teams had played all spring and summer long to prepare for golf, Nic only played the three weeks between the end of baseball and the golf tryouts.

Then this fall he did what I did. He found a new sport. He found boys volleyball. He joined a pre-season club team and learned the game. He fell in love with it. He signed up for tryouts for the club season, but a stress fracture in his back have derailed those plans for now. Hopefully he can get back to playing so he can prepare for the HS season.

Regardless, there comes a time when competitive sports stop and real life begins. Luckily, real life includes intramural sports and co-ed adult leagues.

Youth Sports: Preventing Sexual Abuse

The best thing that you can do as a youth sports parent is to make your kid feel comfortable talking to you about anything. The second best thing to do is ask questions and listen attentively to what is said and perhaps not said.

Here are two situations where I talked with my daughter, listen attentively and helped her out of an uncomfortable situation.

2nd Grade YMCA Basketball

In second grade, my daughter was on a YMCA basketball team made up of boys and girls. The head coach was the grandfather of one of the kids on the team. The coach was over-qualified to be a coach of 2nd graders. He had coached at every level including college. He was a terrific coach and guy.

After the first practice, the coach came up to me and asked if CC was my daughter. I said yes with pride. He went on to tell me how impressed he was with her ability to listen and learn at such a young age. He was also impressed with her determination and athleticism. He gave me his card and told me to call him when she is ready for AAU basketball. On the way home, I told my daughter. She was beaming with pride herself.

The next practice, the coach used CC for all the teaching demonstrations. He constantly called her out to demonstrate a technique or where to be on the court for certain situations. It was second grade level coaching, nothing lofty, but it was quality coaching. Again, I watch with pride as my daughter performed all of the tasks for the coach.

The next week, my daughter did not want to go to practice. She wanted to quit. I asked her why, but she just said she did not like it anymore. I gave her the standard speech about finishing what you start. I knew she loved the sport, so I asked her more questions. I thought that I was going to hear that one of the boys was bullying her. That was not it. I thought that maybe one of the girls on the team was mean to her. That was not it. Finally, with tears in her eyes, she told me that she did not like the coach. I was surprised. I asked why. She finally told me that he touches her too much.

Well, I was at every practice and my daughter was never ever out of my site, so I know that nothing inappropriate happened. She went on to tell me that when she is in front of the team demonstrating plays, the coach pushes her and pulls her. As I thought it was nothing inappropriate, but it did make her feel uncomfortable.

Before the next practice, I spoke to the coach. The coach changed his style and my daughter went on to love basketball and the coach.

Fours years later with a different basketball coach, my daughter started complaining about the same thing. This time I was a bit more concerned because we leave our daughter with the coach. I asked my daughter very specific questions. Again, nothing inappropriate happened. My daughter just does not like to be pushed and pulled.

Again. I spoke with the coach and told him to simply, tell my daughter where he wants her to be and she will move to that spot.  I went on to tell him that she does not liked to be pushed or pulled. The coach was apologetic and the situation was resolved.

The Main Point

Talk to your kids about proper and improper touching. Make sure that they know that they should talk to you if they get into situations that make them uncomfortable.

Furthermore, make sure that the team has a "Coach and Player are never alone" rule. It protects the kid from potential abuse and it protects the coach from potential false allegations.

This post was prompted by a Sportsletter.com article called Preventing Sexual Abuse in Youth Sports.

Momsteam.com also has some great content to help parents protect their young athletes from predators.

Youth Sports: Is God In or Out?

In Bremen, Georgia, local high school football fans would not be bullied by a Wisconsin-based Atheist group who filed a lawsuit to stop the pre-game prayer. The cash strapped school district could not fight the lawsuit, so they reluctantly agreed to ban the pre-game prayer. They are not the first school that had to succumb. The Bremen fans of both God and high school football, would not tolerate this, so together they stood up unified and said the Lord's Prayer before the start of the game anyway. The full story can be found on High School Football Fans Won't Fumble the Pre-game Prayer.


The Main Point

In Bremen, Geogria it looks like God is in, however God is under assault in this country. This was very evident at the Democratic National Convention this week.

This week,  a short 291 miles northeast of Bremen, Georgia, the Democrats gathered in North Carolina for their national convention. During the week, the Democratic platform was released. There were two very significant positions in the platform that created a swarm of negative publicity. Originally, the democrats omitted God from of the platform, a first, and changed their stance on Israel. Debbie Wasserman Schultz, who has never been a close friend to the truth, call it a "technical error". Whether it was pure ideology, a technical error or lack of leadership, the platform pissed off Jews and Christians alike. It's not a good idea to piss off large groups of people before an election, so the Democrats changed the platform to include God and revert to their original position on Israel.

Unfortunately for the Democrats, this change required a vote of delegates to approve the amendments. The vote was very telling. The vote was an embarrassment to the democrats.

The shortsighted Democrats put themselves in a lose-lose situation. If they did not amend the platform, they would lose support from both Jews and Christians. If they voted on each amendment separately, they likely would have passed the God addition, but lost on the Israel situation. They need to Jewish vote especially in Florida, so the tied the two together hoped for the best.

 

There is an assault on religion in our country by radicals. A country without a religious core is doomed to fail. Thank God for the people of Bremen who stood up to the godless radicals. Thank God for the Democrats who stood up to party's radical element.  Now we need all Americans who believe in God to all stand up in unity to save this country just like the fine folks of Bremen, Ga.

Sorry for the political nature of this post, but I when I saw the Bremen high school prayer protest story after watching God be denied three times before the rooster crowed, I could not remain silent.

15 Tips for Twittering Student Athletes

NBC is promoting the 2012 London Olympics as the first social games. Funny I thought they said that about games played in China. Regardless, many of the athletes are tweeting about their experiences. That’s really cool. A fan can really feel like they are getting direct access to the stars they admire because, well, they are.

The Olympic athletes need to understand that what they say on Twitter is there for all to see. Their Tweets, like it or not, define who they are or the perceptions of who they are. Their followers and the blood-thirsty media are evaluating their words and forming opinions. This advice is not just for Olympic athletes, it goes for high school and college athletes too. Some coaches, teachers and recruiters monitor social media so a student-athlete has to be a bit guarded with their social media behavior. 

Hope Solo, hurt her brand with her criticism of Brandi Chastain. Hope Solo had nothing to gain with her twitter rant and a lot to lose. She could lose sponsorship opportunities or future TV job opportunities. She was upset that Chastain was unfairly critical of a US defender. She thought Brandi should be promoting the game and the US team instead of criticizing them. Chastain is not on the US team anymore. She is not paid to represent the team, she is paid to analyze the game. Ironically, Solo’s off-putting comments do nothing to promote the US team or the game. Her short-sighted comments were suppose to be supportive of her teammate, but ended up putting her teammate in the spotlight. 

Here are 15 random Twitter Rules for Student - Athletes.  Please add to this list in my comments section.

1) Build your reputation (or your brand) with informative, interesting insightful or funny tweets. Don’t erode your brand with negative, hate mongering, rants. If you do not like what the media, or a fan, or a coach says about you, don’t get into a Twitter war. You will win by ignoring it.

2) Be real on Twitter and show your personality. You will not get a following if you don’t, but you need to be a bit guarded for good reason.

3) Read each Tweet before you hit send. Take pride in yourself and / or the institution or team that you represent. Ask yourself if the tweet represents who you are or want to be when the tweet is viewed by the world (Fans, current coaches, current teachers, parents, future coaches, future colleges, future employers, friends, family, etc) If the answer is no, delete it. By the way, the NCAA and individual schools monitor social media. Don’t risk your scholarship by Tweeting information that might contain clues to a rules infraction.

4) Be careful about what pictures you tweet or put on your profile. Look at the picture closely and ask yourself, "can the picture be misunderstood?" (i.e. Don’t show a picture of you at a party / bar where you are not suppose to be, Don’t hold up a drink that could look like an alcoholic drink, don’t be in pictures with people smoking, gambling or holding guns, etc.)

5) Don’t put others down. You will come across as insecure. Keep your Tweets real, but lean more toward the positive side of life.

6) Don’t consistently complain about your demanding sports and school schedule. If you are a top HS athlete or a collegiate athlete on scholarship, you are in the top 1 to 5% of people. Meaning 95% of people do not want to hear about your demanding schedule 24/7.

7) Engage with your fans from time to time. Followers love the acknowledgement.

8) Don’t Tweet or ReTweet profanity – makes you look small.

9) It is probably not a good idea to Tweet about religion, politics, race or sexual orientation on your twitter account. You can praise your God, thank Him too, but keep your opinions about other religions that you may not know much out of your Twitter feed. Also, know that if you tweet about politics you are likely

Youth Sports: Female Athletes and Concussions

My daughter, CC, is small compared to the girls that she competes against in basketball. The elbows of these much larger girls are at the eye level of CC. Regardless, she does not back down. This gives me a great sense of pride, but it also makes me a bit nervous.

If you are proud for your tough daughter, yet a bit concerned about head injuries like I am, then follow the link and watch Concussion and the Female Athlete: The Untold Story. The video was created by the University of Minnesota Tucker Centre for Research on Girls and Women in Sport.

The Main Point

Learn about concussions and make informed decisions if your daughter, or son for that matter, gets a concussion. The window of opportunity for sports is small, so parents and athletes often make irrational decisions regarding injuries. There are lots and lots of games and lot of life to live after the games are over. Take the time necessary to heal.

Youth Sports: Should Boys be Allowed to Play on Girls Teams?

In the past, I have tried to answer the question should girls be allowed to play on boys teams?


I determined that the answer to that question was a resounding maybe. 


The question came up when my daughter, CC, tried out for a boys basketball team in 2nd grade. She wanted to play basketball, but there were no 2nd grade girls teams. She made the team and did fairly well. She was not the best on the team, but she was not the worst by far. The team had an outstanding former NBA coach, Ronnie Grandison, so she learned a lot. The following season, CC played with girls. The experience helped set her apart from other girls.


I concluded that girls should be allowed to play on boys teams if they can 1) compete safely against the boys, 2) grow in confidence and self-esteem, 3) improve their skills from the experience and 4) have fun. 


This is especially true if the girl does not have an opportunity to play the sport in a girls league. Chelsea is a standout baseball player in Florida. She proves the point that girls should be allowed to play on boys teams.


It's when a girl wants to wrestle that the once easy conclusion gets a bit grey. 


Last year, an Iowa wrestling standout, Joel Northrup, denied himself a chance at an Iowa State wrestling title by refusing to wrestle Cassy Herkelmen. He refused on religious grounds.

"I have a tremendous amount of respect for Cassy, however, wrestling is a combat sport and it can get violent at times. As a matter of conscience and my faith I do not believe that it is appropriate for a boy to engage a girl in this manner."

The wrestling situation is very complex. I could be persuaded by both sides of the argument, but in this very close contact and often violent sport, I personally think that girls should have their own competitions. 


So what happens when I boy wants to play on a girls team. A boy, named Keeling Pilaro from Southampton, NY, grew up in Ireland where field hockey is both a mens and women's sport. When he he moved to the US, he wanted to continue playing the sport he loves. There was one major problem, however, field hockey in the US is a girls sport. He pursued it anyway and was allowed to play at first, but he dominated so much that they eventually banned him from playing. The kid is hardly an imposing figure at 4 foot 8 inches and 82 pounds for varsity high school player, so safety was not the issue. It was because he was dominant due to his training.








Chelsea Baker is dominant too thanks to a knuckleball that she learned to throw. Should she be banned?


The Main Point


Can the girls argue for equality and fairness at the same time deny a boy a chance to play a sport he loves but has no opportunity to play here in the US?


Title IX is suppose to be an anti-discrimination law. 

"No person in the United States shall, on the basis of sex, be excluded from participation in, be denied the benefits of, or be subjected to discrimination under any education program or activity receiving Federal financial assistance,"

Does it not work both ways?


Let's be honest. Title IX is an anti-discrimination law for women. As a dad of an athletic girl, I applaud Title IX because it will provide my daughter equal access to scholarships. training and equipment as boys. As a dad of an athletic boy, I question Title IX. I see how men's programs have been cut in the name of equality. The law is clearly not perfect.


In the case of Keeling Pilaro, I determined that the answer to that question is a resounding maybe. 

Youth Sports: Two Sport Athlete Overcommitted (Part 1)

Is it fair to commit to two different teams in the same season? Fair to the respective coaches, fair to both sets of teammates, fair to other parents who spend a lot of money to be on a team with high expectations?

My two sport athletic daughter is over-committed and her basketball coach is not happy about it. I don't know what to do about it. Over the next several posts, I am going to think through the problem. I am not a fan of specialization at age 11, but we obviously need to address the situation to be fair to her teams.

Last year, CC found out that a soccer teammate named Mel played both AAU basketball and elite soccer at the same time. CC loves basketball and wanted to do the same. I found it hard to believe that you could do both, but I promised to investigate it. I asked the Mel's dad about it. He told me that they have been handling it with relatively few conflicts. He also mentioned that Mel's basketball team was holding a tryout over the next two weekends.

I looked at the basketball tryout schedule for first weekend and realized that we wouldn't be able to make it due to an out-of-town soccer tournament. That should have been my first clue. I looked at the second weekend and as bad luck would have it, my daughter had a soccer game 60 miles away from the basketball tryout. At first, I did not think we could do both, but I figured out that if the soccer game started and ended on time, we could possibly make it to the basketball tryout 5 to 10 minutes late.

It was a rainy day and I was hoping that soccer was going to get canceled, but it didn't. Fortunately, it was raining so hard, that the refs decided to start the game early and cut half-time short. This gave us an opportunity. Unfortunately, the rain snarled traffic and slowed us and we arrived at the tryout 50 minutes late. That should have been my second clue.

CC took the floor with complete confidence and I took my place on the bleachers. I then did a quick count of the number of girls on the court vying for 10 spots. There were 44 girls. After missing the entire first tryout and 50 minutes of the second, I figured CC's chances were slim to none. I thought to myself, that it would probably be for the best.

After the tryout, I told CC how proud I was of her for confidently jumping right in there. I told her that she can definitely play at that level, but that the chances of being noticed during the last 40 minutes were not good.

The following night, I got a call from the coach. CC made the team the team for the winter. We were also informed that another tryout would be held in February for the AAU National Tournament team.

We accepted the invitation to play on the winter team. CC's soccer team competed in Futsal in the winter, but the winter season for soccer is pretty laid back. CC only missed 3 of 20 Futsal games due to conflicts.

In February, CC made the National Tournament team and we accepted. To my surprise, Mel decided to decline her offer. Her dad thought it was too much. WHAT??#@%@ He convinced us that it could be done. That should have been my third clue.

Well, thanks to a lot of rain last spring, most of the weekend soccer games were rescheduled for the weekdays. And thanks to luck, the 5 basketball tournaments were on different weekends than the 3 soccer tournaments. CC did not miss any soccer games (19) or any spring basketball games (49).

The Main Point

An 11 year old athlete should not have to specialize in one sport, but it is so difficult to do in this over the top youth sports world with year round teams.

This year is a different story all together. It has not rained much this spring and there are lots of conflicts and the basketball coach is not exactly happy. More in the next post - including a letter from the coach.

Youth Sports: Strip Club Sponsors Local Little League

A struggling economy and over regulation has left a local little league's budget a little exposed. 

The budget strapped Lennox School District in California recently doubled field usage fees for a local baseball youth league. Rising maintenance costs and the need to provide security were cited as reasons.

They also banned the league from selling grilled food at the games. For years, the league had counted on sales of grilled food for revenue. The Lennox School District was concerned about public heath - actually they were concerned about financial liability. The Superintendent says that the school district cannot ensure that the league volunteers will handle and cook the food properly. The risk of punitive lawsuits to the school district outweighed the benefit.

These two moves put the season in jeopardy until the Jet Strip Gentleman's Club donated $1,200. Despite the dire situation and the club manager's assertion that the Jet Strip is community and family-oriented, the league returned the funds.

The season looked like it was going to be a big bust, until the publicity from the situation raised awareness of the league's plight.  Donations poured in from more appropriate sources and the season was saved.

This club donated the money without any G-strings attached. They did not demand a big promotional sign at the games. They did not ask for naming rights of the Field - Jet Strip Gentleman's Club Little League Park. Heck, they did not even ask if their girls could perform on the foul poles between innings. Several parents in the district did not mind that the money came from the strip club - money is money. What are your thoughts?

What about bars?

When my son was nine, his team played against a team sponsored by a local watering hole. Each kid on the tavern team donned a yellow shirt. They had their first names affixed on the back of the jersey over a large number. Emblazoned on the front of the jersey was Linda's Bar in classic baseball script writing. When I first saw the uniforms I wondered who in the world would put that on a little league jersey. Then I looked into the crowd and stopped wondering. 

I wrote about that night in my post called Cat Fight in the Stands. 

The Main Point

The world has tuned completely upside down when a strip club owner looks good and a school district looks bad. Somethings have not changed - strip clubs are recession proof, we need tort reform, US schools are a financial hot mess, sex sells and all PR is good PR.

Amusing Ways Youth Sports Parents Deal with Rising Gas Prices

There is nothing funny about rising gas prices, except how we deal with it. See some amusing ways to deal with it.

The cost of gas reached an all time "month of March" high yesterday. Experts are predicting $5.00 per gallon by the summer. This is a scary number for youth sports parents. There are many reasons for these high prices including; 1) high demand for energy from emerging countries like China and India, 2) the shut down of several US refineries, 3) the seasonal move to higher cost summer blends, 4) the unrest in the middle east, especially in Iran and 5) a US government that has been short-sighted regarding energy policy for over 40 years.

If you were told you had to pay $7.62* for each practice, would you sign your kid up for sports?

* Assumes you drive a Honda Odyssey with MPG of about 20 mpg (hwy / city), practice is 10 miles from your house, you do not stay at the practice for the entire 2 hours - instead you drive back and forth twice.

The Main Point

If behaviors don't change in our government, then youth sports parents will need to change. Here are some interesting suggestions to deal with the rising cost of gas.

1. Youth sports parents can charge their kids and any carpool kids a baggage fee for each trip. Little Bobby better fit his baseball bag under the seat or pay up. Tip for hockey moms - charge more for those oversized bags.
2. Youth sports parents can stay at each practice for the entire 2 hours. This cuts the per practice cost in half to $3.81. Beware - this is like torture for many parents. Youth sports parents reveal deep dark secrets when tortured - like their disdain for the coach, some snotty kid on the team or the Hot Mom in the toddler sized spirit wear and push up bra.
3. Youth sports parents can limit food service in the car. Yep - No more drive through visits to McDonalds for trips under 2 hours. You can provide a 1 oz bag of peanuts, a third of a can of soda with ice and a cocktail

Youth Volleyball: Pre-Game Prayer

Wordless Wednesday

Pre-game Prayer

The Main Point

I wish all sporting events started with a prayer. Sadly, pre-game prayers are being banned in secular / public settings.

The terms "Prayer in Sports" or "Sports Prayers" searched on Google and other search portals consistently drives traffic to my site from all over the world. 

Youth Sports: Take a Time Out for Your Marriage

Last year, my two kids played in 256 games and participated in 180 practices. That's a lot of time dedicated to our kids, so last week, my wife and I took a time out from youth sports to reconnect with each other and refresh for the crazy spring to come.

We spent 6 days in the Caribbean while the kids stayed at home with grandparents.

Although our parents love our kids, the schedule that our kids keep would give anyone pause. I was able to convinced my dad and his wife to watch the kids. And we tried to make it easy for them so that they might consider doing it again.

Here are 13 tips on how my wife and I made watching our youth sports kids easy easier.

1. Create a very detailed schedule for each day of the week (see example)
2. Pre-cook and freeze some meals.
3. Set expectations on homework and bedtime with kids before you leave and with your parents (or whoever is watching your kids)
4. Clean and set out school and sports uniforms for the week.
5. Leave a list of contact numbers for doctors, dentists, orthodontist, insurance, school, the parents to your kid's friends (especially those who will be carpooling to practices), the local police / fire, the hotel where you are staying.
6. Leave medical insurance card(s) and a letter saying that the guardian has been given the right to recommend treatment.
7. Pick a destination that is easy to get to and from, just in case of an emergency.
8. Arrange rides to practices with teammates. (I'm sure your parents will

Youth Sports: Parents Role in Helping Kids Select a School

What role should mom or dad play when a young athlete is choosing a school?

National signing day for NCAA was this week. ESPN makes a big deal out of it. One of the top football recruits in the country, Landon Collins, selected Alabama over his home state school of LSU. His mom is a huge LSU fan and was not happy. Watch the video.

Crazy Youth Sports Parents Alert: It is not about you, mom.

______________

My son, Nic, is only in 8th grade, but he had to proclaim his intentions for a high school this past week too.

Nic had four obvious options. The free public high school in our town with is quite good. Moeller High School where his brother went to school. St. Xavier (the rival school to Moeller) and Cincinnati Christian Hills Academy (CHCA). Although there are pros and cons to each, all four options are strong educational institutions. Some are stronger than others but each will provide a great foundation for college. Nic couldn't make a mistake.

Nic quickly narrowed down to two schools based on baseball, Moeller and CHCA. I was ok that he used baseball as a criteria for selection because both programs were strong academically.

Moeller is a perennial baseball powerhouse. Ken Griffey Jr and Barry Larkin both went to Moeller. Moeller plays in the highest state baseball division. Moeller is a great program to prepare a young baseball player for college level. The program is highly competitive, so getting playing time is not a given.

CHCA is also well know for baseball. They have an amazing coaching staff. They are perennial favorites to win the division II championship every year. CHCA is a much smaller school than Moeller (50 boys per class compared to 200), so the competition for playing time is less.

My son set his sights on Moeller, not because of the academics or the baseball program, but because that is where many of his closest friends are going. He was also impressed with the House System. (Think Hogwarts)

I was pushing my son to go to CHCA because it is an amazing academic school and because he could play baseball, golf and basketball for the school all four years. He loves to compete.

Nic's elementary school is a feeder school for Moeller, so getting accepted into the program is pretty much guaranteed. Gaining acceptance to CHCA is much more competitive. Both schools require an entrance exam.

Nic was dead set on Moeller. He didn't want to shadow at CHCA or take their entrance exam.

What should a parent do?

The Main Point

It is not about me. My son is 14. He's old enough to make his own decisions. I believe that my role as a parent is to guide Nic, not make decisions for him. Well kind of.

He decided he was not going to explore the CHCA option. I explained to him that options in life are good and that he had nothing to lose. I also sensed that he wanted to explore CHCA, but was a afraid he would not get in. So I made him shadow and take the entrance exam. I told him that he would go through the process and then he could decide.

I remember when my older son decided to quit playing soccer in HS. He gathered up the courage to tell me. Much to his surprise, I said that was ok. That it was his life and his decision. I also told him that he was going to tryout for the team and if he made the team he could tell the coach that he didn't want to play. I knew he wanted to play, but was a afraid that he would not make it. He made the team and played.

Nic got into both schools. Together we discussed the pros and cons to each. He then made an informed decision to go to Moeller.

Guide your kids. Teach them how to make decisions. It is a life lesson that needs to be learned.

Youth Sports: This Parent Needs a Hug

Yes

At the end of almost every youth sports season, most coaches give a speech about the team. Invariably during the speech, the coach will instruct the young athletes to give their parents a hug and ask them to thank mom and dad for all the time they sacrificed to allow them to play.

Well, the season has just started and I need a hug.

Last week, I missed my beloved NY Giants play so that I could watch my daughter play volleyball. After that volleyball match, I didn't rush home to watch Tebow-mania and the Broncos win against the Steelers because I was watching my daughter play basketball.

Today, I will not be going to see the Villanova Men's basketball team (my alma mater) play the University of Cincinnati like I do every time Nova comes to town. No, I will be watching my daughter play hoops again. And tomorrow I will again miss my Giants play if my daughter's basketball team advances to the finals of the MLK tournament that they are in. They won the tournament last year so chances are good I will be watching my daughter shoot open three pointers while the Eli Manning is throwing TD passes to an open Victor Cruz.

The Main Point

I love my daughter and thank God for the DVR. Now I'm just waiting for a device to pause my kids games so that can play more golf again.

Youth Sport: How to Start A Youth Sports Blog (Part 4)

In Part 4, you will learn how to build traffic to your blog posts with Twitter.

Review -

In Part 1 of the series, I encouraged you to determined if you really had the motivation and passion to start a Youth Sports Blog.

In Part 2, you learned how to set up a blog and perhaps you started to write.

In Part 3, you learned how to build credibility and organic traffic (Traffic via search and referrals).

Follow the steps below and have patience it takes time and effort to build a following.

1. Join Twitter

In Part 3, we talked about joining the conversation on blogs to increase your authority and credibility about your chosen subject. Twitter is another great place to hold a conversation about your chosen topic and as a bonus Twitter can drive traffic to your blog.

I would recommend that you set up a Twitter account in association with your blog. My twitter account is www.twitter.com/Stats_Dad. I use twitter to curate, disseminate and converse about youth sports subjects. 

It's so easy to set up a Twitter account. Just go to Twitter.com and follow the very easy instructions. You can be conversing about your topic in a matter of minutes.

Of course, you need people to converse with and you need followers to see the influential thoughts you have about your topic. So, the first thing you need to do is find people to follow. A simple search on Twitter will uncover a long list of potential people to follow. First, I searched for coaches. After weeding out life coaches, I started following coaches of youth sports who had large followings (500+). I also started following moms and dads with kids, the target audience for my youth sports content. After I found people of interest though my search, I just started clicking the Follow button. You will immediately start to see a stream of tweets from the people you chose to follow.

The next thing that you need to do is join the conversation. When someone you follow says something interesting or provocative click on the rely link and voice your opinion. If you do not have anything to add to the conversation, but like the content, you can simply retweet (RT) the message by clicking on the Retweet link. This rebroadcasts the tweet to your followers. (Note: only followers see tweets) When you RT, the original writer of the post will be notified in his or her tweet stream and perhaps via email (You can set your preferences to notify you of any activity relating to you via email. I do not do this because it will take over your email. Simply look at the activity on Twitter).

Note: People love to be retweeted because it validates the sent message. RTs tell the twitter world that the writer contributed something worthwhile.

Note: In the beginning, I would recommend that you keep your replies positive and supportive.

Soon, you will start to notice that the people you are following and conversing with are following you. (It is somewhat common courtesy to follow those who follow you unless you are a celeb.) Your followers will likely start reading and replying to your Tweets. When they reply to your tweets they expose their followers to your conversation. So make your tweets worth reading and sharing and soon followers of the people you follow will start following you. It is a snowball effect.

If you want to start a new conversation with someone on Twitter simply post a message on your Twitter page with the twitter handle of the person you want to converse with - For example, if you wanted to send me a message that can be seen publicly then tweet @stats_dad I really liked your post on How to Start Youth Sports Blog. The @Stats_Dad is like my address on a letter you are sending. I will immediately see this in my activity column and most likely respond to you.

Note: You can also send me a private message or direct message (DM) via twitter. Click on my profile and if a little envelope icon is there send a message. I need to be following you for you to send me a DM.

Note, you can Tweet 135 character text messages. You can also include links to pictures, videos or websites as long as the text and the links combined are less than 136 characters. 

Advice: Tweet links to each one of your blog posts.

Before long you will have hundreds maybe thousands of people that you follow and who follow you. I have assembled 1000 followers in 10 months.

When you follow a lot of people you will notice that you cannot keep up. You will want to create lists of your favorites. I have a Dads list and a Youth Sports Coaches List. This is easy to do. Click on the person that you want to follow or are following - look for an icon of a head / bust. Click on that and then click on add to list.

Advice: It is a good idea to bond with a person who has a strong twitter following. Intrigue them and they will likely drive traffic to your Twitter page.

Note: You can and should customize your Twitter page to match your website. You can do this through settings and the design button. Use Trial and error to get the look you want - you can always reset it.

2. Set up TweetDeck or HootSuite or similar

There are free Twitter platforms that can help you organize and send Tweets in one view. I use TweetDeck to organize my Twitter streams - The first column is my Youth Sports Coaches list. This column has the most relevant information that I might want to explore and respond to.  The second column consists of tweets from all of the 1,500 people I follow. It is quite cumbersome. The 3rd column showcases all the tweets that @Stats_Dad is mentioned in and the 4th column shows all direct private messages (DMs) to me. Again, this one view layout makes participating on twitter easier. These platforms also make it easy to add videos and pictures and shorten URL links so that you can maximize your 135 character limit. You can also schedule Tweets using these platforms. Sending out a tweet at 2AM will not have the same impact as one sent at 12N unless you have an international following.

Twitter can do all of the above. These platforms just make it easier to see because of the one view layout.

3. Set up Buffer

In the previous posts, I talked about how important good consistent

Youth Soccer: What does it take to play D1 college soccer?

What does it take to play D1 college soccer?

1. Skills - absolutely, D1 college players are among the best of the best.
2. Speed - yes, soccer is a super fast game especially at the D1 level.
3. Determination - yes, you've got to want it because there are plenty of players who will try to take it from you.
4. Perseverance - yes, every career has ups and downs. Only the strong-minded survive.
5. Toughness - yes you need both mental and physical toughness.
6. Heart - yes, the desire to play has to run deep.
7. Support - yes, you need people who believe in you
8. A chance - yes, you need to get noticed.
9. Size - no, not necessarily, but toughness is a must.
10. Playing time in HS - no, apparently not. Some kids are late bloomers.
11. Success at college showcase club tournaments - no, apparently not.

This story proves that all of the above is correct.
.
I was the head soccer coach for my older son's team when he was U10 to U13. The team I coached was the B team in a competitive select / travel soccer club. The A team was dominant. Every year, we would have a tryout and the A team coach would take the top 15 players. I took whoever was left.

The club was strong so, we had a few strong players on the B team. We also had kids with potential. Some of the kids had skills but no real burning desire. Some of the kids had loads of desire, but limited skills. Some kids were confident in their abilities and others lacked confidence. It was the job of the coaching staff to inspire and teach each kid and help them advance in the sport.

The coaching staff consisted of 1) a former Brazilian soccer pro who worked with the team on technical skills, 2) a former college coach who worked with the team on the tactical aspects of the game, 3) an affable, assistant coach with a passion for the sport and 4) me, a D licensed coach.

I think that we did a fairly good job. A few of our kids were promoted to the A team and eventually played significant roles on their HS teams. I always felt a sense of pride when the players from our team were highlighted in a HS soccer game recap in the local newspaper.

Brian U10

One of my favorite players from our team was a great kid named Brian, the assistant coach's son. Brian was a skilled player who could play defense or offense. He was small, but what he lacked in size he more than made up for in hustle, heart and determination. Brian's endurance and fearlessness were strengths of his game. He never seemed to tire and he never backed down from bigger players. Regardless, I never saw Brian's name in any HS sports newspaper stories. According to his dad, Brian made his high school team but did not play much.

Brian did not let that deter him.

Youth Sports: A Plane Crash is a Good Excuse to Miss a Game

Do you go to all of your kids youth sports games? (Please let me know in the comments)

I faithfully and happily go to about 95% of all of my kids games. I do have to miss a few games on occasion. Sometimes I will miss my daughter play a game because my son is playing a game at the same time (or vice versa). Sometimes I miss a game because my wife and I are taking our annual trip together. We travel a week in February from Sunday to Friday to minimize the number of games missed. And sometimes my work interferes with a game. Luckily, I have pretty good control of my schedule so I can avoid conflicts most of the time.

There are some parents who missed most of their kids games. And there are situations where you only see the mom at games but never the dad. The reverse is true too. The reasons, good and bad, vary from work conflicts (including military deployments) to marital issues to lack of interest. And there are parents who go to most of the games but complain about what a waste of time it is the entire time.

For those of you who miss games you could actually make, this short video of a man who survived the plane crash of USAir 1549 better know as the Miracle on the Hudson may change your attitude about going to your kid's games.



The Main Point

This video should inspire everyone to cherish every at bat in little league baseball, every snap in pee-wee football, every tip off in AAU basketball and every minute of a 0-0 youth soccer game.

Time with our children goes by so quickly. Last night, my fifth grade daughter wanted to go to the regional finals of the Ohio State High School Football Championship because all of her friends (boys and girls) were going. Although we did not know any kids playing in the game, we decided to go to the campus of The University of Cincinnati to watch.

High school football is a big deal in Ohio. The stadium was crowded and electric. We had a good time, however sitting amid a sea of high school kids made me realize the my youngest will not be young very long. Soon she will be in high school and more interested in boys than her dad. Actually that's already happening. My son watched the game with his buddies far from my wife and me on the other side of the large stadium. We met up after the game and we walked side by side through campus to the parking garage. Every time I look at him lately he seems to have grown and matured more. At that moment, I realized I will dropping him off at college in 4 short years.

At the game last night, I peeked into the future and it made me bit sad. During the game, I remembered the video above that I just saw this week and it reminded me cherish every moment I have with my kids now. But I did not really need the reminder, I all ready do and I hope you do too.

Youth Sports: The Coach Gift

I received a special end of season gift for coaching. What coach gifts have you received or given?

I had the absolute honor of coaching my daughter's basketball team this fall. The experience to be with my daughter and her friends was gift enough for me, but the team gave me a post season gift anyway.

The team mom, who coordinated volunteers for games, communicated schedules and organized parties, coordinated the end of season coaches gifts. And she did a nice job all year and her choice of gift was great.

The team gave me and the head coach each a personalized, hand-painted tub filled with a mini-basketball hoop, popcorn, peanuts, a photo album and the kicker - 8 bottles of Yeungling Lager. The names of each player are painted on the tub. A lot of thought and effort and maybe cost went into this gift.

Coach's Gift

The Main Point

Gift cards to restaurants are nice, but this was a special gift.

What coach gifts have you received or given? Share the good, the bad and the ridiculous.

Youth Sports: The Sins of Steroid Use in My Backyard

We all think that the use of steroids is confined to professional sports stars who are looking for an extra edge and a big money contract. Well, think again. Professional sports stars are starting to clean up their acts thanks to mandatory testing, but maybe your local high school star has not.

This week, in a small town 15 miles from my house, a decade long steroid distribution ring was broken up by the local police. The steroids were being sold to high school kids who worked out at the Countryside YMCA in Lebanon, Ohio. If it can happen in this quaint town, it can happen anywhere. This hits close to home for me because my kids have competed in that Y many times. (Note this YMCA was not involved in the ring. In fact they helped put a stop to these drug dealers.)



The performance enhancing drugs were imported from China and processed in Tennessee. 32 people, (actually lets call the what they are) 32 drug dealers have been indicted for drug trafficking and possession. This was a big operation and impacted many people over a 10 year period.

Here is my list of seven things at play here:

1) Greed - People so hungry for money that they would jeopardize the future of a young kid.
2) Envy - Steroid users envy those who are bigger, stronger and faster, so they cheat to compete.
3) Pride -  That desire to be more important or attractive than others. An excessive love of self.

Youth Sports: How to Take Action Photos without the Blur

The Camera and Lens are only as good as the Photographer

We recently took some action photos at an indoor basketball game. Many of the pictures had motion blur. 

In a previous post called Youth Sports: Frustrated with Blurry Action Photos? (Part 2),  I discussed how to avoid blurry action photos by buying the right lens for the job.

I bought a Tamron SP AF70-200mm lens with an F/2.8 (aperture) for $800. The F/2.8 aperature is the key to getting enough light at faster shutter speeds.

We started using the lens and was capturing great photos using the advise below.

1. Set your camera to the S setting using the dial indicated with the red arrow. The S mode is an auto-exposure method in which the lens aperture is automatically set by the camera and you manually select the shutter speed.
2. Set the shutter speed. Use the dial indicated by the blue arrow. Look at the shutter speed which can be set between 30 seconds to 1/8000 of a second on my camera. The shutter speed is indicated by the yellow arrow. Rotate the dial until you get to 250. To the right of the number you may see a warning of Lo (low light) or Hi (too much light) for the corresponding shutter speed and the aperture of the lens.
3. Set your ISO to the maximum (1600 on the D70). Two ways to do this. A.) When the monitor is off, press the button on the back of the camera that looks like a checkers board - ISO is printed above it. (Green arrow) While holding this button rotate the dial indicated with the blue arrow. or B.) Using the monitor, press menu, highlight the camera icon on the monitor, scroll down to the ISO and select 1600.

Avoid Photographer Error / Diagnose Problems

It's easy to get lazy and not set up the camera to get the images you want. If you have the right camera and the right lens but you are still getting some blurry pictures you can diagnose the problem by looking at the EXIF data of the photos using your photo editing software.

To Reveal the EXIF data, highlight the photo on your photo editing software. Then Look for the Photo Info link on the main navigation of your photo editing software. I use iPhoto and it can be found on the Photos pull down - Show Extended Photo Info. (Here is a link to a iphoto help site called How to reveal EXIF data in iPhoto).

Last week my wife captured this shot. My daughter looks clear, but the ball is blurry. I looked at the EXIF data and discovered that the Shutter was set to 1/125 - not fast enough and the ISO was 800 - too low for action photos in poor light situations.